David Lyons and I would like to apologize to everyone that we pranked on Devil’s Night. Earlier today, a warrant was issued to search the premises of my accomplice, Mr. Lyons. There, detectives found “DelbertShoopman.com” stickers, identical to ones left behind during the Devil’s Night prankathon. We apologize for any harm that may have come to the people we pranked. If you need help cleaning up, Mr. Lyons and I will be happy to help you. Or maybe we can take you out to dinner sometime, just to show you that there’s no hard feelings.
Again, we sincerely apologize for harm done.
P.S. Del’s password was Batman.
